I've got your Secret.

Too up to eyeballs to write today. Although I may have to take a moment to let you in on a little secret--THE SECRET IS THE MOST ANNOYING THING EVER.

It's like dumbed-down Kaballah (like that is even possible). And worse, it's making bitchy people the world over nice. But not actual nice: the nice that comes when you try to be nice in the hopes that good things will come your way. So it's selfish, fake nice. I was at a party this weekend chock full of typically bitchy girls, who were all wide-eyed talking reverently about the Chicken Soup for the Soul Guy. Dear lord. I had no foes. It was no fun.

The last time I remember feeling like this was when I went up to New York after it was completely Disney-fied. There were no hookers, no porn shops, no muggers, which was nice for about 4 seconds. It was also boring and commercialized. That's what Actual Disney is for.

Okay, so if you want to email me and tell me that it's SO much more than that and how it COMPLETELY changed your life and how Dr. Phil is really a genius, well, go for it. I'll be here stirring my bad karma soup, not being 100% completely entirely positive all the time. Ha!

Update: I had lunch with my friend who actually IS genuinely nice, whose (very nice) thought is that if said bitchy people use this to try to change their ways, then I shouldn't begrudge them. She has a point. Damn.

Sample Sale Scoop!

So on top of bargains galore, fabulous cocktails, and a killer apps menu that I picked out myself, here's some late-breaking further enticement...

Boone and Sons just donated this incredible 14k yellow gold 37" fresh water pearl "tin-cup" necklace for the DSS Raffle. Retail: $1,650. You: looking fabulous in it. Raffle tickets are only $10 (VIP tickets include a ticket). The raffle also includes a Kathlin Argiro dress that you pick out for yourself in her NYC showroom, a denim party at Denim Bar, a stellar pilates package from Pure Joe and so much more.

Tickets are selling REALLY quickly, so get 'em while you can!

News News

Tomorrow is the premiere of D.C. Scout, the Washington Post twice weekly (Tues & Thurs) e-zine that will feature happenings around the region, and will feature highlights from the Post, Post Weekend, Post Express plus original content. From what I am gathering, it's an evolution of ShopDC (whose site is now down--in preparation, I assume).

Keep your eyes peeled!

Tomorrow, or as soon as I have enough time to devote to its fabulousness: the FEAST that was the soft launch of Il Mulino New York on Vermont. Tres fabulous--make your reservations now--it opens next week (and for lunch a few weeks after!).

Truly Original

After much prodding and cajoling (okay, begging and pleading), my favorite artiste and stationer, R. Nichols, has placed just a few of his original works on the block for sale.

In addition to his humongo following (everyone from Tyra to Sheryl Crow), the buzz on his artwork is starting to disseminate far and wide: he was the artist for the best-sellers French Women Don't Get Fat and French Women for All Seasons and he's starting to get a lot of attention from the big wigs and collectors, so consider this your advance notice before you smack yourself on the head and say "man, if I had just bought when they were cheap...".

Rumor has it that there may be a touring exhibition of his works and a really limited collection of signed, numbered prints on the way, but there is really nothing like the original.

P.S. R. Nichols notecards will be making a special appearance in the VIP Goodie Bags at the District Sample Sale!

A Whole New World

Okay, reprieve over.

Armpit of the universe: winner and remaining champion: Orlando, Florida. Dear lord.

The saddest thing I witnessed, not only there but maybe in my entire life, was a man videotaping his wife. At a Rainforest Cafe. Gift Shop. Shopping for souvenir T-shirts.

There were a few highlights, such as enjoying my final expense account trip for a while (Seasons52: a fantastic restaurant; Wolfgang Puck: while I thought both the decor and the food would be cheesy and commercial, only the decor was, the food was fabulous; but Emeril's Tchoup Chop: HORRID. I've never seen any restaurant spend so much time crafting such a perfect-sounding menu, only to completely flub the implementation all around); and the weather was great (I came back to DC's frigidity from a 75 degree day). And my companions were great. It was sad that I was just getting to know some of them, and getting to see how hilarious and cool so many of them are, only to leave right after.

Speaking of, a small tribute to the coolest of them all:
The Monica
3/4 Vodka
1/4 Chambord
Splash of Orange Juice
...serve on the rocks, and enjoy your badass liquor on liquor combo.

So anyway, I was basically in survival mode down there, just trying to juggle as many balls as possible, not drop too many of them, and trying to get a million projects done before my last day. Then I came back home--and I swear, it was to a whole new world:
-Anna Nicole. I literally laid down with a migrane and woke up to the news. The jokes about it just make me uncomfortable, because it's just sad all around. That money is a total curse, and will be forever.
-Barneys Warehouse Sale started. My friend K2, a fashion p.r. director in NYC who is preggers, was at the private first day. She scheduled her sonogram so that she would know the sex of the baby in time for shopping, but they couldn't figure it out. She settled for a cashmere AC/DC rock jersey, figuring it would be fine either way.
-My child learned to say his "l"s. I picked him up out of bed the morning I got back (wearing a sweatshirt with writing across it). He pointed to them and said "Yetters. No, Letters." And it at was that moment that he changed from baby to boy and my heart broke just a wee little bit.
-Speaking of, he also is damn near obsessed with Kraftwerk. So that's fun. But he can now spot Jerry Garcia on the guitar--well, he's about 8 for 10 on average. Not bad for a 2-3/4 year old.
-The District Sample Sale is going fabulously. We have 23 total vendors, just about every boutique in DC plus a few accessories/jewelry people, plus Snow Queen Vodka martinis, Peroni beer, yummy apps, and a great after party: The District Sugar Shack, featuring champagne, a CakeBar cupcake bar, and Grooming Lounge treats for the boys. We raised $10,000 our last time out, and with your help, we'll beat that for this season's chosen cause, SOME Place for Kids.
-My last day of my day job was right after I got back. It was weird being at a job for only six months: not enough time to make any more than a negligible impact. On my last day, the clock hit 6, they shut down my computer, and I left. End of story.
-And now I'm off, in business for myself. I'm terrified. TERRIFIED. And thrilled beyond words. My sister is known for this type of cliff jumping, not me. But this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I have to take it. Wish me luck. Lots of it.

So there you have it. I'm back, a little tired, but it's a whole new day, kidliwinks.