In Tomorrow's Episode, The Role of "Chin" Will Be Played by Zelda
While reserving my spot for tomorrow night's festivites, I overlooked one thing...I didn't hold a place for my companion. She definitely needs her own rsvp-I'm surprised she didn't receive her own invitation. Who is this VIP denied an rsvp? She's the humongous zit that
Zelda first came into my life on vacation a few weeks ago; she showed up with the nightly wine/toll house cookie entree that was the core of my diet that week (reward for dropping the last of the baby weight finally this year, not due to any exercise or sensible diet--just due to stress). I tried to bid her adieu, even going so far as getting sun on my face in a feeble attempt to tan her off (2 rounds of Renova and one round of IPL* be damned). No luck.
When I came home, she finally realized that she had worn out her welcome. For a short spell. Until a quick round of PMS and a bag of Utz Salt & Pepper Potato Chips downed in one sitting brought her right back out for an encore.
I've cleared out every cabinet trying to find the cure, some of which is pictured above: Kiehl's mask circa the late 90's; Pat Wexler scrub (damn you to hell for disappointing me again, Ms. Wexler); Rivage clay masque (the woman at NM told me Queen Rania uses it--how could I say no?); Calamine lotion (it says "drying" and looks like Mario Badescu's drying potion which my favorite store was out of--figured it was worth a shot); Tea Tree Oil; random Avon lotion with Glycolic Acid. (not pictured: Toll House Chocolate Chips; Evil Black Cloud of PMS).
So if you're there tomorrow night, be sure to stop Zelda and I on the red carpet. I'll be glad to introduce you.
*IPL was the equivalent of gathering $1,800, carefully stacking the currency just so, carrying it across the room making sure not to drop it, then flushing it down the toilet. My many, many procedures: a future entry, I promise. Trust me, there are MANY. It could be a blog onto itself.